Gay Weddings are Good for Business

With any industry, it's important to know your market when defining your client base and establishing your marketing plan.  If you want to reach the lucrative gay and lesbian wedding market, knowing the needs of this market is no different.  But beyond the broad "gay and lesbian wedding market", there are a bunch of sub-groups.  For example:

• Older gay and lesbian couples will be attracted to a different set of images, a different style of website and different company values than a younger couple.
• Gay male couples will be attracted to different types of images and language than lesbian couples.
• and then there are sub-cultures within these groups (ie, leather bears) but I won't go into detail about that.

Bit by bit this year, the Census data for each state is being released.  Awhile back I blogged about what the Census data can tell you about marketing to same-sex couples.  Here are some interesting facts and figures for the newest state to legalize gay marriage, New York:

• New York state (not just the city) has 65,000 same-sex couples
• 52% are female couples
• 80% do not have children
• 14,757 live in Manhattan

You can find the data on your own state here.

What does this information tell us about New Yorkers?  First off, don't forget about the rest of the state, not just Manhattan.  There are loads of other same-sex couples in NY.  Also, don't forget about the women.  So much of the media imagery and couples I've seen in articles are more about the men - but there are more female headed couples than male.  Also - there are loads of couples, which means there's loads of business to go around....there's a piece for everyone in this pie.

What is the data like in your state?

I was planning to wait til the fall to launch new dates for the Gay Wedding Institute Certificate course, but in light of my phone and email blowing up with calls from New York wedding vendors looking to enter the gay wedding market, I thought it best to set up some dates for July, before the gay marriage law goes into effect in New York.

So, announcing new dates:  July 12, July 14 and July 19, at 3pm EST.  And of course, non New Yorkers are welcome also!

Registration is open and you can register here!

Same-sex marriage was just legalized in New York state by a narrow margin.  This makes New York the largest state in the U.S. with legal gay marriage (and the sixth state, plus D.C.).  There are approximately 42,600 same-sex couples in the state (though 20% are already legally married).

When gay marriage goes into effect in about a month, gay weddings are expected to boost the NY economy by $210 million in the next three years.  This is amazing news for the wedding industry!

Is your wedding business ready?

• Well, to start, make sure you don't accidentally turn off prospective couples by being heterosexist.  Take down references to "bride and groom" from your website and marketing materials and substitute "couples" or "brides and grooms", for example.
• Make sure your contracts don't say "bride and groom".
• Think about the difference between a straight and gay wedding!
• Understand the federal laws about gay marriage and how your clients can be affected
• Understand what to call a gay wedding

I talk with wedding professionals all the time, from around the country, and have been asked countless times when I'm going to launch a webinar series on the topic of gay weddings...

At long last, here it is!  Introducing the 14 Stories Gay Wedding Institute Certification!

Our same-sex wedding certification program will launch on March 9 with a three part webinar series (each session lasting at least an hour).  You must register for all three dates and attend all three sessions to be certified.  

Attendees will learn all about LGBT weddings:  laws, definitions, terminology, dos and don'ts, etiquette and much more.   At the end of each session, you will receive tangible homework/action steps designed to help ready your business for gay weddings.  Those who attend all three sessions will receive the 14 Stories Gay Wedding Institute certification badge for your website, a certificate in the mail and a resource guide.  Plus, we'll list you on our website to promote your support for same-sex weddings!  

Although we've trained hundreds of vendors from around the country, we're very excited to share our knowledge with an even greater audience!  The first of this three part series is on March  9 so don't hesitate - register today!  The early bird registration fee of $269 ends February 25!

There was recently an article in the Boston Globe about how the new Census data indicates a 17% increase in the number of same-sex couples in Massachusetts.

The Census doesn't ask if you are straight or gay - but it does ask if you have an "unmarried partner" and if you are LGBT and married, you can indicate as such.  Bottom line: coupled LGBT people are counted; single LGBT are not.

Using Massachusetts as an example, based on the new Census data, I know that:

• there are over 20,000 same-sex couples living in Massachusetts
• 11,000 of these couples are two women
• 47% of those couples identify as married (as opposed to "unmarried partners").  Keep in mind that many couples (especially in states where same-sex marriage is not legal) may identify as married even if they are not.  
• 13% are between the age of 25-34 (that's generation Y)
• 23% are between 35-49 (that's generation X and Baby Boomers)

That's A LOT of couples - just in Massachusetts!  That's A LOT of weddings...

What does your state data tell you about your marketing strategies?

In light of the fact that gay marriages are set to resume in California next week, here are a few blogs and blog posts that are an absolute must-read for any wedding vendor looking to work with same-sex couples on their wedding plans:

• What to call a gay wedding
• Differences between straight and gay weddings
• Best places for your advertising dollars
• Engaged same-sex couples, blogging about their wedding plans
• Why the Federal Government won't recognize gay marriags
• Neutralizing the language on your website
• What churches perform gay wedding ceremonies?
• Turn-offs for gay and lesbian couples
• Data about gay weddings
• What do some lesbian brides like to be called?
• How to address gay wedding invitations
• Defining transgender - and what does this mean for gay weddings?

If you read through these articles, I promise that you will have a leg-up on your competition when it comes to bringing in new business to your company - gay weddings are good for business!  And they are great for society.

There is a great article in today's New York Times about the business of gay weddings.  The article focuses on the founders of Equally Wed, the new same-sex wedding website which features articles, advice and a message board for engaged LGBT couples.  The founders of that site, like many other sites providing resources to same-sex couples, saw a need for resources that specifically understand the needs of same-sex couples.  That's why I started my gay wedding planning company 6.5 years ago and is why I'm the blogger on TheKnot.com's site for gay weddings, Gay.Weddings.com.

Equally Wed, Gay.Weddings.com and their counterparts, QueerlyWed.com, GayWeddings.com, RainbowWeddingNetwork.com and SoYoureEnGAYged.com also mentioned in the article are doing great things to respond to the unique (and yes they are unique) needs of those couples. 

Because I work closely with wedding industry vendors, in addition to couples, I am asked by vendors for advice on how to do the right thing.  Many well-meaning vendors assume the industry is integrated and that same-sex and opposite-sex couples experience the same trials and tribulations during their planning.  They assume that same-sex and opposite-sex couples appear side-by-side on wedding blogs, in magazines and in online wedding directories.  We're not there yet.  

But we're getting there.  The same-sex couples featured in Brides magazine and Martha Stewart will help.  But the reality is that there is still a need for a separate space for LGBT couples which is the reason for those sites.  

It's my company's mission to eliminate homophobia and heterosexism (the mostly accidental assumption that every couple is a bride and a groom) from the wedding industry.  That's a lofty goal.  But when it's all said and done, I care more about integration than segregation.  

I'd like to put myself out of business - but I need the help of those well-meaning vendors, Publishers and Editors.  We all have to do the right thing and stop making assumptions about the gender of the couple.  We all have to understand the unique needs of same-sex couples.  It's not just good for society but it's good for business. 

Community Marketing Inc has released the Top 25 US Destinations for American LGBT Travelers.  Note that from this list of 25 cities, only three are places where gay marriage is legal (Boston, Provincetown and Washington, DC).  Also note that some cities and states where gay marriage IS legal aren't on the list - hello Des Moines!  What about New Haven?!

If your wedding business covers any of these cities and markets, you should pay special attention to this blog to learn more about the needs and expectations of the lucrative same-sex wedding market.  If your city is on this list, when gay marriage becomes legal in your area, you can expect a large surge of new potential clients. Percentage is the amount who visited and spent the night in a hotel...

1) New York City: 32%
2) San Francisco: 27%
3) Las Vegas: 26%
4) Chicago: 25%
5) Los Angeles / West Hollywood: 24%
6) Washington, DC: 23%
7) Fort Lauderdale: 17%
8) San Diego: 15%
9) Orlando: 14%
9) Seattle: 14%
11) Boston: 13%
11) Philadelphia: 13%
13) Palm Springs 12%
13) Atlanta: 12%
13) Miami: 12%
16) Dallas: 11%
16) Denver: 11%
16) Phoenix/Tempe/Scottsdale: 11%
19) New Orleans: 10%
20) Napa County, CA: 9%
20) Provincetown, MA: 9%
20) Sonoma County, CA: 9%
23) Portland, OR 8%
23) Baltimore: 8%
23) Tampa/St. Pete: 8%

How does your city rank?

Today, a district court judge ruled that part 3 of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) is unconstitutional.  You can learn more more about the Defense of Marriage Act by following that link, but essentially, it means that my gay marriage in Massachusetts is meaningless most everywhere else including at the federal level and in most states.  Currently this ruling only affects Massachusetts residents.

The law explicitly includes a piece that U.S. states that don't allow gay marriage don't have to recognize gay marriages performed in U.S. states that do.

If this ruling stands, it is significant for a number of reasons and may impact your wedding business:

• Similar lawsuits will follow, opening the door to federal recognition by couples who live in Connecticut, Vermont, and the other places gay marriage is legal.
• You'll see more large receptions in your state hosted by couples who marry where it's legal and return home - the number of couples traveling to legally marry will jump dramatically because it will actually mean something (benefits) on the federal level!
• This should open the door for more states to legalize gay marriage as they see money lost to states where it is.
• Other parts of DOMA that impact the 45 states where gay marriage is illegal are also being challenged.  These states may be forced to recognize gay marriages performed in states where it is.  This means more weddings!
• This ruling will mean more wedding sales for all of us - an annual increase of $9.5 billion when gay marriage is legalized nationally (according to Forbes)