Gay Weddings are Good for Business

I was emailing with a couple recently who sent me a note on their ceremony draft.  One of the grooms wrote, "Jeff and I have been together for more than 14 years.  After a life of saying 'my partner' I'd love, at long last, to say, 'my spouse.'"

And so he did.  Language is a funny thing.  I know another unmarried gay couple together more than ten years who refer to themselves not as partners, but as lovers.  That term is not for everyone but it works for them.

This is a big decision for gay and lesbian couples.  I get asked all the time about how the officiant will declare them at the conclusion of the ceremony.  I now declare you...

• legally married
• lawfully married
• partners for life
• married partners
• husbands/wives to one another
• spouses for life
• something else?

Jen and I chose "legally married" - and that felt right for me in particular because the legal bit is so important.  We live in a state where our marriage is legal and I want that word to be heard loud and clear.  But that’s not always the case and not everyone wants the declaration to sound even remotely “political”.

What have you observed at gay wedding ceremonies?